Lost Boys: The Thirst (2010)

Review by Mari Lynne Rupp



After the dire disappointment of "Lost Boys The Tribe" (which I believe I lambasted in my review) writers and producers seemed to do something not many in hollywood do....Paid attention to the fans.
In this third offering,written by Evan Charnoff and Hans Rodionoff, the writers seem to do their best to amend the sins of the sequels. Let's face it, "The Tribe" was a half-hearted, lazy attempt to rewrite the original, with throwing the Coreys in there to try and "placate" us true fans. In this one, it's a bit more grimy and a bit darker. That's because the fans have grown grimy and darker. There's no more condescending return to vampire basics 101, and they let Corey Feldman drop that stupid cutesy "big-boy gruff-voice" that they made him use in the second. In the first, it was a preteen trying to sound tougher and bigger. When a grown-ass man uses it, it's just.....sad. This installment opens with Edgar and Allan. The Frog brothers. Doing what they do, which is kill vamps and chew gum. Apparently, they were all out of gum, and interrupted a sacrifice of a conressman to an undead senator.
Unfortunately, real life gets a shit deal, and so did the Frog brothers. A vampire got away, and Alan got attacked.
Next scene, San Cazador, California. Touristy, very close to how Santa Carla struck me in the first movie many many moons ago, and Edgar is handed an eviction notice. Next scene, he is selling some of his prize comics from what I'm assuming is what's left of his parent's store. Life has been as harsh to Edgar Frog as it's been to many of us. I appreciated this bit of stark fluorescent reality, it wasn't condescending and it showed EVERYONE got a bit of a pole up the tailpipe, not just us.
Seemingly, out of the blue, a famous vampire novelist Gwen Lieber (sounding suspiciously like Anne Rice and looking suspiciously like Stephenie Meyer) wants to hire Edgar to find her brother, suspecting his disappearance having to do with a vampire DJ, DJ X and a plot to give out vampire blood as the new designer drug to create an army of undead. Edgar tries to recruit Alan, who we find 'alive' but a half-vampire subsisting on animal blood ("You'll soon run out of chickens, Louis!" Thanks, Daniel!!) Edgar suspects the first....VERY first....vampire to be in on this conspiracy, so his thinking, if he kills the very FIRST head vampire, then Alan will revert back. Alan is not as optimistic, but suggest he try Michael ("Killed his brother") and Laddie to help ("Laddie's married with kids, I can't") so Edgar is on his own. Unfortunately, with a reality-star and his entourage to help, and yes, you can guess the royal eff-up that causes.
Without giving too much away, this movie is just better written, better directed, and is taken a bit too (but not too) seriously. Which we fans do appreciate. Gwen Lieber is a fascinating character, played by Tanit Phoenix. You think something is up, not quite on par with her. The second conversation between Edgar and her in her hotel room is particularly amusing, while she gives him the "Vampires are misunderstooooood!" speech after he slams her work for glamorizing mosters. (Well, she does, and so does Anne and Stephenie. Never said they didn't.) And, as we close in on the last rave, and find DJ X, we find our suspicions are well-founded.
Basically, if you felt burned by "The Tribe", go ahead and give "The Thirst" a try. I can't tell you it's just as good as the original, but it doesn't try to be. And that's what I like best about it.