Review by Tim-O
Starring Steve Howey
Directed by Bo Zenga
Horror/Comedy is a genre that I really enjoy. I love the old classics (Bride of Frankenstein, The Old Dark House). The 80’s served up some fun and thrilling flicks (An American Werewolf in London, Fright Night). The 90’s had the first “Scream” movie, which was surprisingly good. This decade has seen the rise of really inventive films like the “Feast” trilogy. Stan Helsing is nothing like any of these movies. It’s more of a horror/comedy/spoof in the vein of the “Scary Movie” series, a truly misfired attempt to blend horror with the Zucker Brothers (Airplane, Naked Gun) brand of humor that worked so well spoofing the disaster/action films of the 70’s and 80’s. What I love about the earlier films I mentioned was that they were good horror movies with funny characters that added the comedy. The humor was smart and the characters were endearing people you could identify with and who you cared about. This dynamic is great for seamlessly going back and forth between laughs and chills. I thought “Scary Movie” was annoying and not funny in the slightest. I’ve never had a positive thing to say about it…. until now. At least it’s not as bad as “Stan Helsing”!
Stan Helsing’s paper thin plot concerns a video clerk named (you guessed it) Stan Helsing, who is ordered by his boss to deliver movies to his mother’s house on the way to a Halloween party. Stan is joined by his stereotypical friends (ex-girlfriend, blonde airhead/tramp, fat “funny” guy) and together they run afoul a vast array of horribly spoofed horror movie villains (Freddy, Jason, Chucky, etc.). They end up in some bizarre “Brigadoon”-esque cursed town that is led by an old waitress, played with deserved embarrassment by Leslie Neilsen who’s had a second career in these types of spoofs ever since “Airplane!” . Stan and his pals end up having to save the town and themselves from the horror villains by using their skills in the ancient art of karaoke, of course.
The plot, such as it is, is just a lame device to stitch together awful gags and forced sex/fart joke scenes that just drag on forever making them even more painful to try to sit through. Steve Howey , as Stan, is either terribly miscast or just a terrible comedic actor. He isn’t likable or even remotely funny. If there are any bright spots to this pile of garbage, they are that the women are hot and Keenan Thompson has a couple of fleeting moments where he made me crack a smirk as Stan’s stereotypical African-American pal.
I really wanted to like this movie and gave it a fair chance. Unfortunately, just because dressing a guy up like Freddy and having him act goofy instead of menacing is ironic; it doesn’t necessarily make it funny. Need proof? Watch “Stan Helsing”. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you. 2/10